I liked Amy. I liked her quirkiness, her individuality, her beehive and of course her amazing voice.
Like so many others I read of her problems, saw the photos of her ‘high and out of it’ at concerts and of course the photos of the so public brawls
I was always touched by her vulnerability, of a tender soul unused to the ways of the world. I felt it was always possible to pick her up and put her back onto the very rickety rope bridge she had chosen to walk across. We all choose our own paths but at times the choices are burdened by a past which we cannot forget.
Last night I dreamt of Amy as a young female teacher on the Island of Okinawa as the Americans and the Japanese fought over it in the Second World War. One day her little school house got caught up in the fire from planes. I don’t know which side they were on, and it doesn’t really matter which. As the young teacher tried to calm the children and tried to get them to hide under the rustic tables some of them panicked. The children screamed and ran in all directions as she tried to pull them back to the relative safety of the building. She saw one young boy blown up in front of her just before she too was killed by a blast.
These memories from the past especially with terror involved still lurk under the surface and disturb our equilibrium. They affected the balance of her mind in this life as she felt both let down and guilty as she could not protect the children. These memories cannot be reached but drugs or alcohol numb the mind and make the lurking images recede for a while. Drugs themselves though can disturb the consciousness and affect how deep the memories are held and so the use of drugs becomes self defeating. They help to temporarily hide the disturbing dreams or memories yet often bring them closer to the surface and so an addiction begins as the person searches for an elusive inner calm.
I don’t know how she died but I feel it was a problem with her heart both from the years of drug abuse and the memories floating around inside her from the life in the Pacific, not to mention years of heartache in this life as well.
Rest in peace Amy and allow the wonderful strong blues of this angel to calm the terror inside. Allow her to heal the memories of this past life, not to remove the memories because they are a part of you and what make you unique but to remove the pains from the terror inside which haunted you in life. Allow her blue energies to give you the courage to move on into your future.
For more info on the angels please see www.angelsrus.co.uk